Friday, February 06, 2009

Still feel like crap

Ok, it’s been 2 weeks now.  Time for this cold/flu/gunk to move along to greener pastures.

 

You see, my wife is a teacher, and my son is a child.  The two of them are constantly tracking gazillions of nasty parasites into the house because they spend all day around filthy little monsters who eat dirt and lick paint and play around in sewer drains and basically do the equivalent of wandering around the CDC facility in Georgia with no protective gears.

They don’t mind it so much, because they build up immunities to all this crap on account of their constant immersion in the funk.  Sure, the Lovely Wife gets knocked down right about 3 weeks into school on a fairly regular basis, as does the boy.  But I somehow manage to avoid the first round.  Probably on account of my own school and work schedule keeping me mostly separated from those two filthy monsters through the worst of the first of it.

 

But then…  BAM!!

 

They bring all their nasty germs in on the second round and knock me down with wave after wave of foulness—sinus infections, respiratory infections, flu, cold, nausea, “oh, there’s a bug going around school, you’re going to be sick for 2 days, sorry!”.  Yea.  Thanks.  Thanks a fucking lot.

 

Howabout 2 weeks?  Huh?  2 BLASTED WEEKS!!  I’m ready to start feeling better now.  It’s time.  Please give this cough back to Courtney, or Aden, or Ralph, or whichever little beast gave it to you to give to me.  Please give this headache back to Mrs. Gonzales, or Ms. Ethel, or Eugenia, or whomever gave it to you to give to me.  I’m done with it.  Seriously.  I’m totally done with it.

 

Oh, and the achiness, too.  It’s no longer amusing to me.  I have work to do in the garden this weekend and the bone-weariness from the aches and pains just really get in the way of that.  So Martha, or Raul, or Edgar, or Ms. Cox, or any of the filthy vermin in Ms. Miller’s class who may have passed on this particular symptom can just take it back and choke on it.

 

And next time they think about passing on their particular malady to me, please suggest they slam their hand in a door.

 

Wow, I totally wasn’t going to write about that this morning…  I was thinking more along the lines of nostalgic song memories.  Maybe another time.

1 Comments:

Blogger K said...

Hate to break it to you, Joe. I've had the nasties for 4 weeks. I just started feeling human a few days ago.

Hey, at least it gives a a REAL excuse to not run!!

Hope you feel better soon!!

4:40 AM  

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